Friday, 13 April 2012

Greatwhiteegret, newcastle co.down

I don't believe this - it's a travesty. Not the egret of course, I get loads of them in the pond at my garden, it's bloody Ken Clegg the biscuit thief again.
I went for a stroll in my capability brown designed patch of turf in Newcastle only to find that somebody had erected a birdhide without my permission. As I was kicking the shit out of it I noticed that it was filled with bicuit wrappers. There were the remains of my custard creams that went missing last week and the hobnobs that I'd left on the windowsill last night. It can only be Ken Clegg but the joke's on him - he left this polaroid of the egret behind. Well, it's mine now Ken.