Tuesday, 28 April 2015

Suspect arrested

 News just in is that the PSNI have arrested and charged the Nobirds "suspected Jack Snipe" at Lough Beg and have charged him with impersonating a Common Snipe. This is a very serious charge and the maximum prison sentence if found guilty is two years at the Why O Why Reserve in Belfast!
Also the Carryduff Sawmills rang yesterday to say that the Grey Shrike, twice removed, third cousin of Uncle Buck who lives in Cullybackey has been re-identified as a Pied Wagtail but they did say they had a Hoopoe there 4 weeks ago if that is of interest to anyone and finally...... our under pressure Health Minister (he is still actually the health minister despite apparently resigning)  rang to say that he will be organising a lot of boat trips to some Protestant Scottish Island this summer to look at the Protestant birds over there. No four by twos, fuzzy wuzzys, cat lickers, gay boys, normal people or anyone who doesnt own four bibles and has a British Passport are welcome. Peoples eyes will also be measured before getting on the boat to make sure they are not too close together and feet will also be checked to make sure they are not webbed.  They will be going out in the Good Ship 1690 and of course all McGarrys will get on free, those good old law abiding citizens. Cost of trip will be £10 and there will be several renditions of Nearer My God to thee sung on both the outward and inward journeys. If you have a Swaztika Tatoo you will get on half price. You are asked to keep a note of any Whooper Swans you see on the Journey... only in this little country or state.Jim said they will collect rocks on the island and bring them home just incase they run into Iris Robinson on their return, she needs stoned to death according to the good book (no not the new Nobirds Report)

Some photos from good old Lesvos. Misundstood Jim Wells would love it out there as there are no Catholics (hurrah!) however the place is full of Greek Orthodox (boo hoo) Fair play to Jim he did say the Nobirds are an Abomination we love Jim